Weekly ‘Flix Fix: Titanic II
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It’s pretty rare in the music industry when the sequel outshines the original movie. Unfortunately, “Titanic II” is no exception. To say the least, “Titanic II” is a train wreck — or shipwreck, to be more literal.
From misused literary terms to a bad use of computer graphics, this movie is nothing short of bad.
The story follows no certain path, but lightly touches upon different problems and events. It starts off with the maiden voyage of the “Titanic II,” a ship that matches its predecessor in nerve and steel. The viewer has no idea where the ship sets sail and only knows that it takes off on the 100th anniversary of the original Titanic’s maiden voyage.
The movie follows the fickle relationship between Hayden Walsh (Shane Van Dyke, who also wrote and directed the movie) and Amy Maine. Unfortunately, but predictably, this relationship lacks the depth and emotional connection like that of Jack and Rose from the original “Titanic.”
After plenty of cheesy shots of high rolling ship goers, the Titanic II gets word of a massive chunk of ice breaking off Greenland. This chunk, the size of Rhode Island, will cause a tsunami that will roll across the Atlantic Ocean at speeds of 800 miles-per-hour.
The tsunami in turn will cause a huge iceberg to be propelled into Titanic II’s path. As predicted, Titanic II is doomed for failure — and dramatically on the same day of the original Titanic’s sinking.
As the ship sinks, the Coast Guard director in charge of ensuring safety to all Titanic II’s passengers declares the lifeboats to be a death trap. After much unnecessary and unrelated shots of stage blood and hallways, the ship half explodes and half sinks.
Like all terribly predictable films, “Titanic II” ends with no satisfying resolution. Hayden dies, and Amy is reunited with her father. No concern is given to the rest of the passengers on board, leaving the audience to assume they all sunk with the ship.
“Titanic II” sticks out on the Netflix queue because let’s face it: who doesn’t want a sequel to James Cameron’s masterpiece? Unfortunately, the movie will never live up to the 1997 classic and probably doesn’t even deserve the right to use the word “Titanic.”
But, what can you expect from a director who also made “Paranormal Entity” and “Transmorphers” (a prequel to Transformers)? What the movie does do, however, is give the audience a much deeper appreciation for good cinema.
After sitting through 90 minutes of faulty green screens, unrealistic computer graphics and flat dialogue, you’re guaranteed to develop a newfound appreciation of quality filmmaking.